Thursday, July 22, 2021

40.


 

I have been a bridesmaid 14 times. I've designed couture toilet paper dresses on more than one occasion. I've worn matching bedazzled t-shirts and donned penis shaped accouterments whilst out on the town. I've attended and thrown every variety of shower: engagement, wedding, baby, even golden! My collection of floor length unflattering gowns and acumen for determining what exact type of chocolate is smashed up in a diaper to charmingly appear as excrement is unparalleled. It has truly been an honor and a source of real joy for me to witness, and participate in, your societally sanctioned celebratory events.

 

It is in that same spirit that I invite you to celebrate, and participate in, my Spinstermoon (trademark pending)!

 

Who says you have to have a ring or an episiotomy to have a party!

 

I had hoped to make it to all 7 continents before turning the big 4-0, but alas - it turns out traveling costs can really add up and time is fleeting. The final frontier, Antarctica, is just beyond my reach, so I figured if we can crowd fund breast implants and dog surgeries, we can crowdfund my life's work.

 

Love, Levity and Happy Birthday to Me,

Briana